Chief Folake Ajayi is a legal practitioner, child counselor, women’s rights advocate, social commentator and former chairman of FIDA in Oyo State. In this interview with YEJIDE GBENGA-OGUNDARE, the principal partner of Folake Ajayi & Co. speaks on women as enablers of violence, abuses, laws for protection of women as well as women in leadership among other issues.
As a former FIDA chairman, how would you rate the body’s role in ensuring women get adequate protection from violence?
The International Federation of Women Lawyers (FIDA) has done a lot in the sensitization of the public on the provisions of the laws that protect women against every form of violence, so even abusers are now aware that it is not business as usual for them. FIDA has never hesitated in ensuring that women across the nation get adequate protection against violence and where necessary they get adequate compensation from those who have violated their rights. The effect of the body cannot be undermined or emphasised enough.
Often, women are the brains behind violence against other women, how can this trend be curbed?
The ones who seem to be the brains behind violence against other women had at some times suffered violence too. They naturally assumed violence is normal for women to stay married and because they survived, they expect every woman to survive. What these women need is a sort of re-orientation. The evil cycle needs to be broken.
What are your thoughts about women in politics and leadership?
I will categorically say that we do not yet have enough women in politics and positions of leadership. I believe when we have more women actively participating and taking positions in politics, more women-friendly policies and law will be made and implemented. There is actually a need for more women to go into politics and aspire for positions of leadership.
There are legislations for women protection, why does it seem they are not working?
Indeed, there are laws and those laws are effective, but the challenge is that most women are not aware that there are laws in Nigeria protecting their rights and interest and because of this, when their rights are breached, they suffer in silence. You can only use an instrument that you know about its existence. Another reason why these laws seem not to be working is that those laws need full implementation
Do you agree with the assertion that religion and culture aid violation of women’s rights?
Well, I will say that it is the wrong application of religious and cultural tenets that aid violation of women’s rights. If one sits and ponders on these tenets, one will see that they preach equity and treat others, especially women, with respect. For instance, the Christian faith urges the husband to give honour to his wife as a weaker vessel. Now, when you give honour to a person, can you at the same time disrespect that person? When you love your neighbour as yourself, will it be easy for you to hurt that neighbour? Other religions too encourage men and husbands to care for their wives.
Often, policies made for women don’t have impact on women at the grassroots, how can this be changed?
I have always been an advocate that NGOs with particular interest in women’s rights and interest should not limit their activities to the cities but should rather go to the women at the grassroots to ensure these women benefit from the policies. This is the only way to have impact.
Some people have negative ideas about women aspiring for greater heights in positions considered a male domain. Are these negative views justified?
There is no justification for such views. Once we all understand what gender parity means, our orientation will change. Such opinions are formed based on misconceptions about gender roles.
From your experience as a counsellor, what are the greatest causes of abuse in Nigeria?
There are many causes of abuse but the greatest of them all is what I will call enablement. Now, I am talking about abuse of women. No one can abuse you without your consent. When someone abuses you and you do nothing about it, you have encouraged him to continue to do so. It is time to break the culture of silence as women and individually take a stand against violations.
What do you think is responsible for rise in cases of gender-based violence and abuses in Nigeria?
I do not think there is a rise in cases of gender-based violence; rather, what we are seeing now is that more people are speaking up about the violence and the abuse they are experiencing. This is as opposed to the era where such cases were swept under the carpet and treated as a family affair.
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