The story of the woman whose four children were discovered not to belong to her husband raises questions about trust in marriage. This situation has once again emphasised the importance of DNA tests for children of couples in a relationship or marriage. This story informed our question for today. Joel Okoeguale assisted in sourcing responses to this topic. Below are responses from some of our contributors:
Esther
If you are talking about free DNA tests, that is another thing. This is because those tests are expensive and discourage families who cannot afford them. I believe families who wish to do the tests should be allowed to depending on possible reduction of the cost.
Tosin Awoniyi
I would recommend DNA tests for all families so that fathers would know If they are truly the biological fathers of their wards. How would a woman give birth to children that do not belong to her husband and her mind would be at rest? It is uncalled for. There are many advantages of doing DNA tests for one’s children. It would boost the man’s confidence. If a man is being suspicious of his wife to the extent of losing trust in her, the best thing for the man is to carry out a DNA test on his children.
Then, there are trust issues. The man must be emotionally mature to accept the results. DNA test should be carried out on a child so as to ascertain if the man is the biological father of such a child, especially if there is an established evidence of infidelity on the part of the wife. It should be done due to the rate at which women cheat. The rate at which some women commit adultery in their places of work is quite alarming and embarrassing. So, it is necessary for fathers to carry out DNA tests on their wards.
Ebuka Don
I have always said this, any lady that I am dating or intend to marry, I would tell her that if we eventually get married, I would do DNA tests for all my children once they clock one year.
Ige Gbadamosi
This may create more havoc to our society. Let us take the steps of our forefathers. Whenever there is a paternity doubt, let us follow the traditional way to unravel the situation. It would go a long way in solving these issues. I have heard a case where women confess when such steps are to be taken genuinely.
Okpameri Son
I do not believe in 100 per cent accuracy of DNA tests. A lady was pregnant and the guy doubted the pregnancy. He instructed the lady to go for a scan. The first scan result shows that the lady is seven weeks pregnant. How could it be? When they only meet five weeks ago? The guy was very mad at the lady and the lady was also surprised and depression set in. After crying for some days, she decided to visit another hospital for another scan and the result was five weeks. So, I do not believe much in a single test result.
Bayo Adebayo
DNA test is suicidal. It does not worth it. Be pessimistic about everything that comes your way so that you could enjoy your life to the fullest. What has the man gained now? It is better for him not to know and live his life to the end. It is not new and would not end. There may be other reasons why the woman did so. Men should first check their potency and write their wills as well before a DNA test.
Emmanuel Igoh
Nigeria has the highest number of paternity fraud indexes. So, it is okay to recommend DNA tests because cheating in marriage or relationship now is normal. It is too risky to risk one’s life to unknown circumstances.
Bankole Olowookere
The other side of the story by the woman claims both the man and his family should have been aware that their subject (husband) is impotent and the wife emphatically asked for another woman to be used to comfirm the impotency. My view is that the marriage should have been dissolved instead of trying to keep a stolen cock hidden in a bedroom.
The agreement on marriage is very important. Surrogacy should have been agreed upon before proceeding to joining lifetime companions. So far as the couple trust themselves, there should not be any DNA test. But where infidelity sets in, they should take care of it immediately instead of it resulting into a DNA test. So, I am not recommending DNA test but sanity and the prevention of a bad marriage.
Uche Mo
It is a must and non-negotiable. If you could save money to do marriage, please save another to do DNA tests the same day the child is born and then confirm before assuming further responsibilities. However, if the child is grown and has eaten part of retirement money, they become adopted.
Lewis Afolabi
Let the four children live. The woman messed up. The man messed up for making noise when he knew he could not perform. Common Sense should have told him something is fishy somewhere and then find a way to manage the bad situation instead of embarrassing himself, wife and the innocent children.
If DNA test is done for all families, there would be gnashing of teeth all over Nigeria from north to south, east to west, Aso Rock Villa to motor parks. Let us not start what we cannot bear the consequences.
Obi Esther
First, discoveries have been made that for every sexual partner a woman has, a part of his DNA is being deposited in her. So, who knows, she might have been faithful to her husband in marriage but not faithful to herself before marriage.
Again, she might have a lover who ‘supplies her’ when needed. If that be the case, I do not see her reason for getting married in the first place. It is unfaithfulness and cannot be justified.
E J Ebojoh
I would not totally recommend a DNA test for every family. A man should be able to know the kind of woman he is married to, that is what she is capable of doing. In a case were the husband has failed to know his wife capabilites, then he should be termed a failure because if one is to pretend, it does not take long for the real character to suffice (there is no way one can successfully cover a smoke)
My candid advice for families on this issue is that if by any chance you sense there is a foul play, then the needful should be done. Otherwise, sincere and faithful women should not go through such humiliation just to prove a point.
Beloved Faith
If there is anyone in doubt, the person should go for a DNA test because no one is to be trusted now.
Leji
If a man impregnates another woman outside, he would be jailed or deprived of his assets. But when a woman does it, she would walk off the marriage with the children and life goes on.
Chikezie Uche
Yes, everyone. It should be done immediately after birth to prevent the pain of this fraud.
Jibola
It is unfortunate. However, recommending DNA tests for all families is an infraction on their privacy. It is up to each family.
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