The decision to live together as a couple before marriage varies among individuals. The decision could be shaped by cultural, personal and religious beliefs. Hence, our topic for today: ‘What are your thoughts on couples living together before marriage?’ Joel Okoeguale assisted in sourcing responses to this topic. Below are some of the responses of our contributors:
Takang Roseline
It has advantages and disadvantages. You would leverage the time you live together to know each other better — that is, the likes and dislikes of each other. However, the Bible does not permit that arrangement because of the immortality associated with it. Some couples may continue to live together for years without thinking of doing the right thing (marriage), till old age or death catches up with them.
Divine Yabet
I cannot live with my partner before marriage. There is a high chance that he would not consider getting married to me again because, by then, we would be doing what married couples do.
Joel
I think it is necessary. The most certain way to know who you are marrying is by living with the person before marriage. Then, you would see the flaws and know if it is something you could handle for the rest of your life. I do not want to be unhappy in my marriage after seeing the true colours of whom I married when I should have seen it before, when we lived together be marriage.
Tosin Awoniyi
Staying or living with one’s partner before marriage is not Biblical and is uncalled for. How would I be staying with someone I am not yet married to? The person that has not known my parents not to now talk of paying my bride price? I could not stoop so low and do that. Besides, staying with one’s partner before marriage is against our culture and is not Biblical, as I mentioned earlier.
Adegboye Oluwabukola
I cannot because it is not Biblical. 1 Corinthians 6:18 says, “Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually, sins against his own body.” Living together almost always opens the door for temptation or involves premarital sex. By living together before marriage, you dishonour both yourself and your partner.
Nathan Kyle
Many benefits come with cohabitation. the only fear of most women is the fact that the man would get tired of them and not want to marry them anymore.
Tolulope Agbeja
I am a Christian — and, as a Christian, I must follow the principle of God. Living with my partner before marriage is wrong. I could not even sleep overnight. It means I would be acting like a wife I am not yet. Until we are properly married, I cannot.
Blessing Olayinka
It is not acceptable. Any potential couple that would want that should be responsible enough to get married before cohabitating or living together.
E J Ebojoh
It is not a bad idea for my partner and I to stay together before marriage. I know it is not possible to get to know someone fully, but this period gives us some level of understanding of who we are before marriage. Weekend visits could cover for living or staying together before marriage.
Ngozi Okereke
It contradicts my Christian faith. The Bible talks about fornication, which is a sin against God and our body. You might say “We would live together without fornicating.” However, the flesh or the hormones would long for it as long as you keep seeing each other alone in the same place, at all times. Staying together is not bad, but it could lead to fornicating.
Furthermore, my family frowns at it. Then, my culture frowns at it too and sees it as an abomination. I see it as an immoral and impatience act. I believe that if you want to be joined with someone, marriage should come in immediately after courtship. It must not be an expensive one. Also, why steal what you could actually get and make it yours forever?
In most cases, the partners do it secretly. I see it as not placing much value on the other partner. One partner might start feeling that there is no need to go into marriage in most cases.
Rahab Balogun
I do not think it is okay. I think it does not make such a relationship last. I believe that when you begin to live together, seeing each other every day would result in not valuing each other.
Peace Austin
This is the reason most people go into marriage with divorce in their heads. No matter how mature or spiritual they might be, they might consummate the relationship. Mere visitation may lead to fornication, and we are talking about cohabitating. Are youths of this generation thinking? What then would you enjoy after the wedding if you start cohabitating as a single couple?
Comfort Udo
It is wrong for two unmarried people to live together. Living together would lead to sexual immorality. Visiting the opposite sex during courtship in homes/secret places is not permitted because one would be tempted to kiss, hug, romance, or do the unusual which can lead to sex. So, partners who are not officially married cannot live together.
Ability Obioma
It is unscriptural (against the Word of God). Man and woman could only live together when married, according to the Word of God.
Osais
It has benefits and disadvantages. One advantage is that both partners get to know each other well. The demerits include the chances of premarital affairs. The fun of living together would no longer be as jolly as it is supposed to be after the wedding. I would rather the couple meet once in a while at the man’s place. Not live together.
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