Patrick Doyle, ex-husband of Nollywood actress Ireti Doyle, has sent a cryptic message to men on handling public humiliation and personal hurt.
Sharing his thoughts on his Facebook page, Doyle emphasised that nothing tests a man’s essence more than when his ego and dignity are tarnished by a humiliating snub or gesture from someone with whom he once shared intimacy.
He urged men to avoid impulsive reactions in such moments and to seek solace privately, rather than airing their grievances publicly.
“Nothing tests a man’s essence as when his ego and dignity are rubbished by a humiliating snub or gesture from a person with whom he once shared intimacy,” Doyle said.
He reflected on the emotional toll such situations can take, adding that “At such times, it is best not to react in the moment but rather pause and consult your maker. More importantly, never address a humiliation from such a person in the public space.”
Doyle drew from a Yoruba adage that translates to, “The world should never see the perspiration of a husband on the chest of his wife,” highlighting the importance of keeping personal matters private. “Whatever a man does for, to, and with his wife, whether ex or current, should remain between them,” he stated.
Doyle disclosed that his post was inspired by a dear friend who was hurting due to his ex-wife’s actions, which seemed intended to humiliate him. In response, the friend lashed out publicly—a reaction Doyle understands but cannot condone.
“I understand his hurt, and to an extent, I understand his reaction. However, understanding his reaction and endorsing it are two different things,” Doyle explained.
He noted that the private details of his friend’s pain were already known to close associates and did not need to be shared with the world.
By going public, Doyle warned, his friend had invited unnecessary scrutiny, allowing “the wise and the foolish” to exploit his anguish.
Doyle’s commentary also extended to a recent drama involving Davido’s logistics manager, Isreal DMW, who engaged in a public spat with his ex-partner. Doyle criticized such actions, stating, “It takes a special species of low-life man to engage in a social media saga with his former partner.”
He condemned the act of dragging intimate disputes into the public eye, emphasising that a man diminishes his dignity when he stoops to airing personal grievances online.
Doyle cautioned against giving anyone the power to control one’s narrative or emotions. “In my opinion, no one must have the power to trigger me into handing over my anguish to a mixed multitude for their perverse entertainment,” he wrote.
He concluded by stressing the importance of turning to God during moments of deep personal hurt. “An anguish he should have surrendered to God, who would have consoled and restored his dignity in no time,” Doyle advised.
