YEJIDE GBENGA-OGUNDARE explores the legality of the Regulation and Control of Expenses of Marriages, Naming and Circumcision Ceremonies and for Purposes Connected Therewith-2022, recently passed in Sokoto, how it affects culture and whether necessary.
While Nigerians were preparing for a change in government in states and at the federal level, the people of Sokoto were confronted with an issue that affects what they see as their culture and way of life when the state authorities, came up with the idea of regulating bride prices and other marital relationship-related activities and expenses as well as naming ceremonies in the state.
The development generated a lot of debate when it was made public, days before the May 29 inauguration and was received with mixed feelings among residents, as the law which has been in existence was amended with the view to make it operational.
The law tagged “Regulation and Control of Expenses of Marriages, Naming and Circumcision Ceremonies and for Purposes Connected Therewith-2022” was awaiting the assent of now-ex Governor Aminu Waziri Tambuwal as at May 29 after the Sokoto State House of Assembly last Tuesday, passed the bill, to regulate extravagant spending in marriage, naming, circumcision and other local ceremonies across the state.
The lawmakers, had, at a plenary session presided over by the Deputy Speaker, Abubakar Magaji, unanimously adopted the report presented by the Chairman of the House Committee on Religious Affairs, paving the way for passage of the bill, which was sponsored by Faruk Balle (PDP, Gudu) and Abubakar Shehu (APC, Yabo), into law.
Abubakar Shehu Yabo, who co-sponsored the bill, said the law is aimed at reducing the extravagances in organising ceremonies in the state, adding that the house took action following series of complaints, from members of the public, over the high cost of marriage in the state.
“As you are aware today, getting married by our youth has become a great challenge following the economic hardship and unnecessary spending.
“Such traditional madness has continued to pave the way to an increased number of crises which have been leading to rampant divorces within our society,” Yabo said.
He added that the law limits the pre-wedding expenses to only two cartons of sweets with N20,000 but there is no limitation to dowry and pegged the purchase of clothes for the bride to only 10 wrappers, among others.
There is also a penalty for violations; the law stipulates one month imprisonment for violators or an option of N50,000 fine and the law will only be applicable to Muslims.
Expensive Sokoto ceremonies?
While defending the law, proponents argue that it is in the interest of common good because wedding ceremonies have become too expensive for many young men and is now a burden and an impediment.
According to reports, spending towards a wedding starts from the time a boy starts dating a girl when he is expected to make his intention known to the parents of the girl as he is expected to present several items including cartons of sweets, noodles, crates of soft drinks, cartons of biscuits, kolanuts and money to the parents of the would-be-bride.
These items, are usually brought to the girl’s house in a long motorcade involving family members and friends amidst fanfare. It is said, that the cost has become a barrier to young people marrying and has been identified as a source of early crisis-ridden marriages and subsequent collapse.
And residents confirmed that weddings are expensive in Sokoto state. Jamilu Altine Kware, stated that the lowest amount a groom could spend on his wedding is N1,000,000, adding that “the sum of N150,000 is for introduction; another N150,000 for bride price; N300,000 for wrappers, cosmetics and shoes; N100,000 for a set of boxes and N50,000 to the bride for pre-wedding activities.”
Also, the bride’s parents, need at least N1.5 million to buy furniture, kitchen utensils and foodstuffs, among required things for their daughter.
Another resident, Malam Musa Ubandawaki. whose son was preparing for his wedding stated that they had so far spent about N1.4 million on wedding dresses for the bride-to-be.
“We are now preparing for the payment of dowry and other expenses which we estimate will consume at least N350,000,” he added.
However, expensive weddings are not limited to Sokoto state; getting married in different cultures is a capital project that gulps a lot of money, and this, the proponents of the law said, was responsible for the measures taken to reform the law as a step towards reducing extravagances in the planning of ceremonies as a proactive effort towards reducing the burden of the high expense of marriages.
Available records revealed that the Bafarawa administration toyed with the idea of looking into cost of weddings though many were of the opinion that it was an interference in the private affair between two families through legislation. Lawmakers at different times, however continued to tinker with the law since it was first enacted in 1992, reviewed in 1996 and examined in 2022 with the purpose of revising and amending it and a final draft, passed to the executive.
Threat to culture?
Aside the issue of interference raised by people against the law, they also mentioned the fact that it is eroding the culture of the people with particular focus on Kayan lefe, which is a Hausa marriage tradition where the groom buys expensive gift items for his bride and formally present them, to his in-laws with the entire family of the bride in attendance and they use the opportunity to assess the affluence of the groom.
Kayan Lefe, which is originally an Hausa practice, has become a common tradition in Northern Nigeria and is being practiced in almost all ethnic groups in the northern part of Nigeria and a huge part of marriage proposals.
Items on Kayan Lefe for an average man include: One big box (worth 100,000 and above),another set of boxes( 5 or 6 pieces), minimum of 15 wrappers, 5 pieces of lace, guinea brocade and other materials, set of head veils, Jewelry, underwear, night gowns, cosmetics, shoes and bags.
When Kayan Lefe is ready, the groom’s family takes it to the bride’s family house, where elders in the family, consisting of her maternal and paternal relatives come together to welcome them and the boxes are opened and the items counted for the sake of accountability.
The practice is however seen as a stumbling block to many marriages in Northern Nigeria as many young men reportedly find themselves unable to meet the expectations of their in-laws and are unable to marry, because a man who cannot afford Kayan Lefe, is seen as worthless.
It is believed that a groom uses Kayan Lefe to signify his love and capabilities towards taking care of his bride’s needs after wedding and the man must fill up to five or six boxes that meet the taste of the girl’s family and many brides have confirmed that it leads to delay in marriages.
Knocks from the Bar
Dave Ajetomobi, former NBA chairman
“Honestly, it is one of the needless laws in our statue books. This type of law will only be enforced against the less-privileged sons and daughters of nobodies in the society. The legislature that passed the law will not obey it because it will not enable them to display their affluence and connections.
“ It is needless because the masses do not ordinarily prosecute expensive weedings. At any rate what is the definition of what is reasonable spending for wedding? The definition will depend on the position of the parents of the bride and/or groom in the society.
“If Tambuwal spends 1 billion Naira, for son’s wedding, it is reasonable spending because of his political standing while the son of a local imam in same state who spends 1 million Naira may be extravagant, given the resources available to him and family background. It is good to check reckless spending for weddings in view of what we have witnessed in the country of late, but not by legislation that will be flouted by the privileged class without sanction, but by constructive engagement of different classes of citizens in the society to appeal to their conscience,” he said.
Chief Yomi Alliyu (SAN)
I don’t think it is the business of government to dabble into privacy of citizens concerning marriage and naming.
Adeojo Bamidele
It is very unnecessary and a waste of time and resources. Lawmakers should focus on issues that matter and stop meddling in unnecessary issues. The matter should be limited to the families involved.
Mass weddings as antidote?
As huge cost of wedding ceremonies become a major issue due to the poor economy, some states have devised means to lessen the burden.
Authorities came up with the idea of mass weddings! to assist the less-privileged get married, with funding from government, providing dowry, foodstuff, clothing, furniture and kitchen utensils for couples.
Also, religious groups have been sponsoring mass weddings to help their members. This practice, has been embraced in Kano, Sokoto, Jigawa, Zamfara, Gombe, Niger, Kaduna and has spread to south-western Nigeria. Such mass wedding took place in Ibadan on the bill of a non-governmental organisation.
Mass weddings have become a viable social welfare programme in northern Nigeria. The first mass wedding in Nigeria was believed to have taken place on May 15, 2012, in Kano when the state government assembled 100 couples for marriage in an effort to tackle the state’s high divorce rate.
Bill in conflict with Sharia?
A renowned cleric in Sokoto state, Sheikh Habit Sani Maihula, said it was very important for the people of the state to abide by the laws concerning marriage and any other religious laws, adding that extravagance in marriage is not encouraged by Islam.
“The negative effect of extravagance is that we will have our sisters unmarried because marital expenses in our society are scary. When someone spends millions of naira to marry a lady, another person who is looking to marry another lady from the same family may have a problem.
“Islam does not put limitations on dowry but it cautions us against extravagant marriage. As far as the law is concerned, I think it is good for the state government, the Sultanate Council and other authorities including the Ulamah to come in and take some measures against extravagant expenses in marriage,” he said.
For Maman Aishat, the bill is a source of joy to every family, adding that the state House of Assembly should be commended for reviewing the law.
Also, the Sadaukin Sokoto, Malam Lawal Maidoki, while commending the lawmakers, urged members of the public to abide by the law after the assent of the bill.
“The lawmakers did what was expected from them by Islam and members of the society and this single act can lead them to paradise. It is now the duty of every Muslim to abide by the law when it is finally implemented by the governor of the state,” he said.
Sheikh Isa Talatan Mafata however kicked against the law, arguing that it contravenes provisions of the Shari’ah law.
“The lawmakers have no right to regulate marriage expenses because the Shari’ah encourages everyone to marry a person that matches his social class. If you are not rich you cannot go and marry the daughter of the richest person in your community because you will not enjoy the marriage.
“This law first surfaced during the Bafarawa administration and when they sought my advice, I told them it would not work. I cited an example with the then Sultan, Muhammadu Maccido. If you were marrying his daughter and you brought two packs of kola nuts, would that be enough? I believe even 100 packs of kola nuts would not be sufficient for them.
“Take for instance, somebody taking the hand of the governor’s daughter for marriage. Do you think they will accept N10,000 or two packets of sweets? When they sought my submission, I told them the law would not see the light of the day because those in power would be the first to violate it.
“It would only affect the masses but it would not be imposed on those in position or the rich in the state,” he said.
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